Talk:Coin Eater/@comment-5900631-20190419192113

You have quite a bit of talent there, my love. Will admit, at the first paragraph was a little bit confused as to what was happening but not necessarily a bad thing; made me puzzled enough to keep reading.

The only thing I might suggest is that change it up a bit so that William and his box are having an effect on a witness, yes? Perhaps the narrator could be using these three paragraphs to more thoroughly explain what he was seeing, and how it affects him? My thought upon reading is perhaps that this narrator could be a relative, or perhaps even a detective assigned to the case finding the poor dead man unexpectedly.

For your very first writing assignment not a bad bit of work at all. C+.